The year is 2039, a viral disease has once again spread across the planet infecting the world’s population. The virus at first seems benign but slowly people start to realize the horrifying consequences of the infections. The virus targets the Gluteus Maximus and dissolves muscle and fat at a rapid pace once it becomes established within the tissues. Doctors and research teams try their best to develop an effective vaccine but are unable to tackle it. Hospitals are overwhelmed with patients screaming as their butts are being eaten by the virus with doctors unable to do anything except pray for them and cry.
Once luscious and plump booties are now shriveled to nothing but bone. Yoga pants and spandex start to sag and blow in the wind as the big buttocks that once filled them have all but evaporated.
The Ass-Pocalypse has arrived and all the big booties of the world have been consumed by the virus. Kardashians are now wandering the streets of Calabasas, looking for scraps of food in dumpsters. Once vibrant beaches and gyms filled with healthy juicy booty meat now lie decaying and abandoned. The falling sales of booty shorts have crashed the global economy and riots, looting, and armed militias have taken over and collapsed the governments of most nations.
The stars and heavens that once revolved around the big bodacious butts have lost their glimmer and now wonder aimlessly throughout the universe searching for a new purpose.
Pictured: The Sad state of Booties during the Ass-Pocalypse
The empty bootyless void of space is a dark and unwelcoming place. What purpose is there to rebuild humanity and a society without booty? What reason is there to continue on with live with everything in ashes and no bouncy butts to shake in the moonlight?
There is nothing left and only big booty Instagram pics of the past to remind us what life used to be like.
…..but there remains some hope.
For some hares from the future have arrived and will now time travel back to the year 2024 to stop this dark and chaotic timeline from unfolding.
At Gloriass #4 the hares will unleash the power of the booty to make hashers butts and booties so firm that the virus will stand no chance against it. We will shake, wiggle, and jiggle spreading the magical power of the booty across the entire galaxy and beyond.
DRESS CODE: TIGHT BOOTY SHORTS
Hares:
Snake Cunter, Pukelid’s Taxivomitry, Polish My Helmet
Type:
A to A, Bag Drop Available
When:
September 28th, Saturday, 2024
Time:
Meet at 2:30pm, run starts at 3pm
Hash Cash:
30 RMB for Trail (Run and Circle); 105 RMB for Trail and Dinner
Meetup: 乾元大都涮肉 烧烤(安贞店)
Qianyuan Dadu Shabu Shabu BBQ (Anzhen Branch)
Address: 安定路甲24号楼一层